Saying Goodbye
by MuggleNat
Summary: DH SPOILERS After finishing Deathly Hallows I began to wish for a bit more closure on the deaths. These two chapters belong between the final chapter and the epilogue and are my ideas on what happened during the aftermath of the Battle of Hogwarts.
1. The Aftermath

Harry, Ron and Hermione exited Dumbledore's office and, as if by some silent consent, paused in front of the fallen gargoyle. As one they gazed at their surroundings, taking it all in. Hogwarts hadn't changed. Apart from the obvious evidence of combat it was still the building they knew and loved. As they walked along the corridor, passing scorched paintings, damaged suits of armour and smashed windows Harry felt peculiar, as if he was a stranger in this building that had been his home for six years. He noted that some of the portraits had been removed; no doubt they had depicted notable Muggle Born wizards. He was only drawn out of his thoughts when Ron turned in the direction of the Great Hall while he and Hermione automatically headed down the corridor that would lead them to Gryffindor Tower.

"Where're you going?" asked Harry. For the first time he noticed how pale Ron was.

"I – I just want to – you know – see him again. You know we didn't have much time before, what with – everything."

Harry didn't need to ask what Ron meant and he had to admit, his short visit to the Great Hall hadn't afforded him much time and his mind had been on other matters. Without replying he and Hermione followed Ron down the staircase, Hermione taking Ron's hand as they descended.

The Entrance Hall was the most damaged area they had seen so far as the majority of the battle had taken place there. Most of the windows had been broken, the walls were covered in cracks and craters, remnants of spells that had missed their targets and the Slytherin emeralds were scattered at irregular intervals across the hall having been kicked about in the chaos of the fight. A number of covered bodies lay abandoned in one corner, no doubt the bodies of the Death Eaters. His eyes lingered for a moment on the pale, long fingered hand that was showing from underneath one of the covers. His eyes then fell on the arm of the body next to Voldemort's and his heart leapt. He'd recognise those black robes anywhere. It was then that he remembered that he was the only one who knew what Severus Snape had done, what he had sacrificed and he knew that he could not allow him to remain abandoned next to those Death Eaters.

"_Accio Pensieve_!"

"Harry, what - ?"

"Professor Snape's over there," he said meeting Hermione's eyes. "I can't have him lie there among those Death Eaters. He deserves better."

The Pensieve flew down the stairs they had just descended and landed neatly in his hand. Snape's memories still swirled within them.

"Potter!" Professor McGonagall was striding across the Hall having just exited the Great Hall. Harry approached her and handed her the Pensieve. "Potter? Why are you giving me this?"

"It contains some of Professor Snape's memories. I hope you'll agree that he doesn't deserve to lie with Death Eaters after you've seen them."

Professor McGonagall considered him for a second, a small crease on her brow. Without a word she strode swiftly into a near by class room and closed the door.

"I'll show you later," said Harry as Ron and Hermione stared at him, confused. Without another word he moved towards the Great Hall followed closely by his friends.

The Great Hall was filled with the sound of grief. Since Harry had last been there the families of those who had fallen had arrived and were grouped around those they had lost. They headed towards the group of red hair discernable through the crowd in the middle of the Hall. George still had Fred's head in his lap, Harry had a suspicion that he hadn't moved from his brother's body since he had seen him last. He seemed beyond tears now, although his face was streaked with wetness his eyes were dry. He simply stared numbly down at his twin, his hands gripping Fred's shoulders. Mr and Mrs Weasley were kneeling on either side of their son. Mrs. Weasley, dishevelled with a sizable gash gleaming on her left arm was sobbing once again, clinging to her son as if her life depended on it. Mr. Weasley was gazing at Fred's still face, silent tears dripping onto the pale hand he was holding. The rest of the family stood around them comforting one another.

At their approach they all turned. Mrs. Weasley stood up and hugged Ron fiercely as if to confirm that he really was there, that he really had survived. Ron's shoulders shook as he clung to his mother. It was strange to see Ron crying like that, let alone consenting to let his mother hug him. A lot of things had changed. Ginny's eyes met Harry's but she didn't move from her brother's side. Hermione gave a strangled sob and Harry felt hot tears spring to his eyes as he gazed down at Fred's body. The circumstances had allowed for little more than numb shock, he'd had to concentrate on what needed to be done, despite the fact that he wanted more than anything to pause and mourn the loss of such a close friend. He seemed to be making up for lost time as his tears joined all the others. He glanced at Hermione who seemed unable to speak through her tears. She seemed lonely standing there when everyone else was being comforted by another. Before he knew it Harry had pulled her into a hug and she sobbed audibly onto his shoulder.

He had no idea how long they'd all stood there. It seemed an age, centuries. Then a strangled voice interrupted the silence.

"Oi, that's my girlfriend you're hugging."

Harry and Hermione parted. Ron was watching them; evidently Mrs. Weasley had released him from her embrace, a weak smile curled at the corners of his mouth. Harry tried to smile back but his muscles refused to respond. Within seconds Hermione had switched her attention to Ron just as Harry's attention was caught by the sounds of a baby crying. His heart leapt as he remembered who had been lying next to Fred.

With one last look at the Weasley family, Harry walked a few paces to the right and his eyes fell on the two figures lying next to each other and the solitary figure kneeling next to them clutching her grandson to her chest. Andromeda Tonks gazed down at her daughter, tears pouring ceaselessly down her face and little Teddy Lupin squirmed in her arms, unaware that his parents were lying cold and still, close enough to touch.

Tonks' hair had returned to her natural mousey colour making her look less colourful than Harry was used to and she was covered in the marks of her fight. Remus lay next to her; he looked asleep, just like his wife. It seemed to Harry that all he needed to do was to shake them gently and they would wake. Yet he knew it couldn't be so. He remembered the first time he met Tonks, standing grinning up at him from the hallway of Number 4, Privet Drive a whirl of colour, gently mocking Mad-Eye for his warning that Harry may lose a buttock. His stomach clenched as he remembered that Mad-Eye too had been lost in this war.

However, his eyes were drawn more powerfully to the body of Remus Lupin, last of the Marauders. Voldemort's evil campaign had wiped that fun loving group of friends into oblivion. Two years ago he had lost Sirius leaving Remus as his only link to his father, the only remaining person who had known his father intimately. Now that too was gone. Memories flooded Harry's brain in quick succession, the first time he met Remus on the Hogwarts Express, tackling the Boggart, suspecting him of assisting the murderer Black, the realisation that he and Sirius had been his dad's closest friends, Grimmauld Place, Christmas at the Burrow, discovering that Tonks had fallen in love with him, even, his stomach clenched, calling him a coward for considering leaving Tonks and their unborn child. All that seemed to have been forgiven, although Harry wished that he'd had an opportunity to apologise to him for his behaviour. Perhaps it didn't need to be put in words, the way Remus had embraced him at Shell Cottage, gleaming with happiness at the birth of his son, suggested that he knew that Harry was right in a way. Perhaps not to call him a coward but that his place was with his wife and child. Andromeda was Teddy's only immediate family now. It was with a rush that Harry remembered he'd been made Teddy's godfather. He made a silent promise to Remus and Tonks that he would be there for their son, just like Sirius would have been there for him had circumstances been different.

Andromeda had seemed not to notice Harry as he stood there, now however, she looked up and met his eyes. He moved to kneel next her, close to where Remus and Tonk's heads were resting on the cold stone floor.

"I tried to tell her not to go. Told her that if Remus died at least Teddy would still have his mum to look after him. She was always stubborn."

Harry wasn't sure why Andromeda was telling him this, perhaps she just needed to say these words aloud. Her gaze fell, once again on the still form of her daughter.

"Harry, would you mind terribly if I gave you Teddy for a bit? I – I need some fresh air."

Harry nodded and clumsily took Teddy in his arms; he'd never held a baby before. Andromeda adjusted his arms a little so that he was holding Teddy a little better murmured a quick thank you and exited the hall swiftly, head bowed.

Harry gazed down at his godson. _His godson._ It was strange thinking of him like that. He suddenly felt older than he'd ever felt before, not in a bad way, he simply realised that he would be leaving school soon, entering the world of work, of independence. He was no longer required to return to the Dursley's, he could do what he liked. It was then that he realised, more strongly than ever before, that nothing else had existed beyond his confrontation with Voldemort. His whole life had been leading up to that point and he'd been unable to see anything after that. More than that, for many minutes he had believed that there wasn't anything for him, that he was going to die and leave all this behind. For the first time he could see a Voldemort-empty future ahead of him. A life devoid of the pressure of being The Boy Who Lived. The Chosen One.

Teddy gurgled and reached down towards his mother snapping Harry abruptly out of his thoughts. The baby's hair was blue today, Harry couldn't say exactly what shade because it kept changing every few minutes. He squirmed in Harry's arms, gurgling and reaching for Tonks. Harry imagined for a second that he was trying to say 'Mummy' although he suspected that Teddy was too young to have begun to speak yet. He didn't know of course, he had no idea about babies; perhaps he really was attempting to speak.

A gentle hand touched Harry's shoulder. He started slightly and looked around. Hermione had left the Weasleys alone for a second. She slowly knelt beside Harry and stroked Teddy's hair.

"Are you alright?" she asked softly.

"No, but I will be," he answered, his voice was a little hoarse.

"I can't believe it," she whispered, tears glittering in the corners of her eyes, "Remus and Tonks. And they'd only just had Teddy." She paused to gaze sadly at their still forms. "I was so happy when I found out Remus had married her. I'd always felt so sorry for him. I understood why he refused to allow himself to be attached to Tonks. He'd lost too much in the past, he was so used to being hurt and losing the people he loved that he didn't want to risk it happening again. After being alone for so long I was so happy to see him with a family. Remember his face when he came to tell us about Teddy being born? He was so proud and happy to be a father. And just when his life seemed to be going right for once, just when he glimpsed happiness and the end of his loneliness it was torn away from him once again. It's so unfair."

Teddy was squirming even more insistently; Harry lowered him slightly so that he could reach his parents. He reached down and grasped a tuft of both his mother and his father's hair, in one hand he held the mousey brown shade of his mother's, in the other the greying brown of his father's. Hermione, who had been trying her best to stop herself from crying again, burst into tears.

"It's like he's saying good bye to them," she choked before becoming overcome with sobs.

There was a movement and Harry looked up to see the Weasley family beginning to move out of the hall. Harry stood up too, Teddy began to cry. Andromeda, who had just returned from her walk, silently relieved Harry of him and began attempting to calm him. Harry was quite pleased about this only because he hadn't a clue how to attempt to make a baby feel better.

"We're going to go home to get some sleep," said Mr. Weasley with some effort. "You three should get up to your dormitories." Harry nodded and began to move. Hermione, however, was staring at Tonks.

"I can't bear to see her with that hair colour. The only time she had it like that was when she was so upset she couldn't control it. I'm sure she'd hate it if she knew." She bent down over Tonks' head murmuring a quick incantation and when she finally moved Tonks' hair was the shade she had favoured when she had lived, a bright bubblegum pink. It was amazing the difference that hair colour made, she was as bright and colourful in death as she had been in life. It made her look so much more like Tonks. Andromeda burst into tears, passed Teddy back to Harry and hugged Hermione tightly sobbing endless thank yous through her tears.


	2. Farewell

Harry woke the next morning with a headache. It seemed that all those tears had taken their toll. He couldn't quite remember how he had got to his dormitory, everything after the great hall was a blur. He had been pleased to notice that Professor Snape, freshly cleaned of all traces of blood, had been moved from his original place next to Voldemort to lie in the Hall with the other casualties. There was some angry murmuring about this from most of the family members; of course they knew nothing of what he had done. They'll know soon though, he thought, I'll make sure of that.

He sat up and took in his surroundings. The dormitory was simultaneously familiar and strange to him as if he had only dreamed of the place before now and suddenly woke to find that it is real. He got dressed, he decided against waking Ron who was snoring gently behind his hangings, and went down to the Common Room.

The atmosphere was subdued. There weren't many people there as most of them had been evacuated or were in the hospital wing being treated for their injuries. The weight of the experience of the day before was visible on everyone's faces, not in the least because, as a tribute to the lost lives of the Battle of Hogwarts, an enormous poster had been pinned over the entire notice board covered in many moving photographs depicting each victim. Every picture had an individual beautifully ornate frame, their house crest at the top with ribbons of their house colours enclosing the picture finishing on either side of the ornate letters that spelt the name of the individual. In the centre was the only splash of Slytherin green and Professor Snape gazed down into the virtually empty Common Room. Harry's eyes lingered on Colin Creevey's picture, that familiar over excited gleam in his eye. He shouldn't have lost his life. Fred was grinning and laughing heartily at some long forgotten joke, it seemed strange that his laugh would never be heard ringing through the Burrow again. Remus and Tonks' pictures were next to Fred's, Remus' face with that painfully familiar calm, polite smile was surrounded by the red and gold of Gryffindor, Tonks' by the yellow and black of Hufflepuff. It suddenly occurred to Harry that he had never known what house Tonks had been in at Hogwarts, why had he never asked? Underneath all of these pictures enclosed in an elaborately drawn banner were the words: 'Gone but never forgotten.'

"Hi Harry."

Harry turned to see Neville standing close behind him; he too was staring up at the photographs.

"Hi," he looked at Neville who looked battered but not overly hurt, "Voldemort didn't hurt you too badly did he?"

"No, I'm fine."

"You were awesome, Neville. Killing his snake like that – thanks."

Neville smiled.

"No problem. At least Nan won't be able to moan about how I haven't lived up to dad's standard anymore."

Harry smiled, for the first time in years it seemed.

"Harry." A softer voice spoke behind them and Harry's stomach gave a pleasant lurch, he knew that voice. He turned to find Ginny standing by the stairs to the girls' dormitories, slightly tousle haired, evidently having just descended. For a second they looked at each other, then, with two quick strides, Harry had crossed the short distance between them and pulled her into a fierce embrace. She responded weakly, evidently the memories of the night before were still strong and it wasn't long before she was sobbing onto his shoulder. Harry held her tightly; trying to provide comfort through the physical contact as there were no words that he could think of that would make her feel any better.

For the longest time they stood there, then Ginny's sobs became less frequent and she detached herself from Harry's arms. At that moment Ron came down the stairs, glanced at Harry and Ginny who were holding hands and uttered a single word.

"Breakfast?"

---------------------------------

The next few days went by in a blur, the evacuated students returned to complete their school year and the whole school simply buzzed with a mixture of happiness and grief. Many of the students had lost family members, they were the most subdued faces in the corridors or during meals in the Great Hall, but through it all the happiness that Voldemort was finally gone for good permeated through the whole building.

Harry wished he could join in with the merriment, the singing of Peeves' highly original victory song, the excited conversations anticipating how the wizard world should change for the better now that such an enormous threat had finally been eradicated. However, he found it impossible. It was not that he wasn't happy that Voldemort had gone, in many ways he had more reason than anyone else in the castle to celebrate his defeat, it was just the memories of what it had cost to rid the world of his threat that prevented him from truly feeling happiness.

The day before they were all to leave there was a memorial service that took place outside in the grounds. Every student and the family members of the dead attended. Harry was reminded forcibly of Dumbledore's funeral only a year ago. Was it really only a year? Professor McGonagall stood up at the front of the mass of chairs and recited a speech followed by a list of the names of each victim. After each name had been read there was a storm of applause from the crowd as they mourned the deaths and celebrated the lives of those who had fallen.

---------------------------

After that, it wasn't long before the students left the school on the Hogwarts Express. A distinctly pleasant feeling rose in Harry's stomach in spite of himself as he exited Platform 9¾ to be met, not by the unpleasant sight of the Dursley's, but by Mr. and Mrs. Weasley. That feeling increased when they arrived back at the Burrow, where Harry would be staying for a while. It was so refreshing to think that he would never have to lay eyes on Privet Drive again.

Over the next few weeks there were funerals to attend. Harry seemed to have a constant headache during this time as the weight of grief never left him for too long. Professor Snape's funeral was more crowded than Harry had expected, there had been many stories in the Daily Prophet reporting to the world that Severus Snape had been working for Dumbledore all along, still, Harry wasn't sure if many people would believe it. Until the funeral. It was packed with people, all the teachers of Hogwarts, every member of the Order of the Phoenix, what seemed like half of the Hogwarts students, not to mention various Ministry officials and members of the general wizarding public. Finally, Snape's sacrifices were recognised and celebrated.

The double funeral of Remus and Tonks was a much quieter affair by comparison. Harry sat with Teddy Lupin on his knee as Andromeda was too overcome with grief to hold him, and when they were buried side by side, Teddy made a little movement with his tiny hand that seemed for the world like he was waving good bye to his parents.

There were many more to attend, including that of Colin Creevey. However, the last was that of Fred Weasley. Harry sat throughout the ceremony with his arm around Ginny his heart heavy with accumulated grief. At the grave side, he watched as Fred was lowered gently into the ground and as the final words were spoken over his grave there was a tremendous bang and the twilight sky was filled with light.

Fireworks cascaded through the air in a whirl of colour, their sparks burning like Phoenix fire before gently crackling into oblivion. Harry would recognise Weasley's Wildfire Wizzbangs anywhere. As he watched, the sparklers that had originally spelled out rude words curled to form the same word: 'FRED'.

"I used our entire stock," said a quiet voice next to Harry, he turned to see George standing beside him. It was the first time he'd heard him speak for almost a month now. "I made some changes of course," he added, watching with tears glittering at the corners of his eyes as one of the sparklers spelled out his twin's name in red and gold sparks, "It felt like the best way to say goodbye."

Finally, a particularly large sparkler traced 'FRED' with a flourish, for a few seconds it gleamed there, like a new constellation against the dark sky before with an enormous out burst of banging and cracking it exploded and faded into oblivion. The silence rung in their ears, there was a pause and as one every single person burst into applause for the fantastic display of fireworks and for Fred.

------------------------------

As hard as those weeks were, Harry felt like the majority of the poison that had been burning inside him since the battle had been extracted. It was not completely gone, that would take much longer, but he had said goodbye, his friends were finally at rest and he could begin to work slowly towards his future. He wasn't entirely sure what to do, he had left school, he had defeated Voldemort and so far school and Voldemort had been the two constants in his life, keeping him going with a purpose. Now that they were gone he felt strangely empty. Still, whatever he decided to do he knew he wouldn't do it until he'd had a good long rest. After what he had been through he needed some time to enjoy his freedom, a feeling he could never remember having. It would take time, recovering from such cataclysmic experiences always does. Yet, he knew that the time would come. He had Ron, Hermione, Ginny and the rest of the Weasley family. For the first time he realised how much of a weight he had been carrying all these years and how light he felt now that it was gone. It was finally time to live his life in peace.


End file.
